Japan to World: We gotz the Whores!

Come Inside Japan, Where the Magic Happens!

Come Inside Japan, Where the Magic Happens!

Japan, have a seat. We really need to talk….

I’ve heard  about your sending of envoys around the world to promote Japanese culture.

That’s a great idea man, I really think it would be wonderful to get more people around the world turned on to what you’re doing here.

Whoa there, buddy! When I said ‘turned on’ I didn’t mean it like that!

I’ve been reading about these envoys you’re sending around the world, these ‘ambassadors of cute” as the Japan Times mentions, and I dunno man. I’m not getting a good feeling on this one.

I think you might have figured it out all wrong.

You do realize you’re selling your image as a country of cute whores, right?

Awe man, I didn’t mean to say it so bluntly, but honestly, don’t you think this could end up being a bit of a problem?

When we think of Paris we think of art and food, while America stretches forward with its rugged landscapes, vibrant cities, and individualistic, wacky folks. India gets by on its colonial old world adventure vibe, while Africa depends upon its unique environments and animals.

Those are powerful images.

Meanwhile, you’ve decided to embrace girls in maid uniforms and cosplay outfits.

After all the foreign ministry brainstorming, the best you could do was to think of sending a brigade of whores abroad to talking about dressing up as submissive french maids, school girls, or in animal costumes while chatting about fashion and Japanese comic books?

Don’t be so offended. Although I have my own overly personal hatred for most picture books (my students are surprised when I read big books with no pictures), I’m not so biased to be blinded to the fact that there are some great works of manga out there written by very intelligent people.

Why don’t you just send those people abroad to talk about Japan and what they do, along with other authors, artists and creative people?

No, no, I’m not suggesting we dress up manga writers and artists in school girl uniforms. I’m saying we let the merits of their work speak for themselves and attract people to Japanese culture and sensibility.

Oh, stop it, you really need to get off this “kawaii” kick! That would be as silly as Neil Gaiman in a school girl uniform. You really gotta get off the cosplay vibe!

Don’t you realize that in portraying you women as cute, submissive whores in costumes that you’re completely undercutting the abilities, intelligence, and natural beauty of the women in your country.

You’re selling an image of your women as hot, shallow and superficial sluts with knee socks and short skirts that live to exist like real world barbie dolls

While I realize that you’re womens’ rights records is woefully below that of most Western countries, is this really an image you’d like to perpetuate around the world?

I assure you, it’s already a pretty heavy image around the globe. I don’t really think you need to enhance  it with your envoy of barbie sluts. You might actually want to think about downplaying it some.

During my time in America, I remember many an otaku fanatic, woefully wishing for the day they could come to your magical shores and bask in the adoration of overly cute whores who loved them for their intense interest in maid costumes and Dragon Ball.

Thank god, this isn’t actually that country (mostly).

Those type of folks come here by the boatloads already, trawling the streets for their “kawaii” girl, often operating under a completely false presumption of how these women may react to their advances and how they should be treated.

Do you really want to promote this to a whole new level? Do you really want the world thinking that your women are all barbie dolls ready to be played with?

If it’s government sanctioned and an actual government funded endeavour, it just becomes all the more official as a country’s platform.

Is this something your government honestly wants to be known for promoting?

Do you really know what you’re getting into?

Man, we’ve shared some good times together. I don’t want to get mad at you. But seriously, you really need to ponder what you’re aiming for.

Sure, I’ve partaken in some of your wacky snacks and all their ‘kawaii” vibe glory, but at the end of the day, when I want to quantify why you’re my friend and why I keep hanging out with you, it’s not cause of your barbie whores.

So sit back and think for a little bit about a better way. There’s gotta be one.

Best of luck to you, man, I hope we can figure it all out and not strain our friendship anymore…

(Meanwhile, I will someday totally undercut this post (if not already) in a future post where I talk about some beautiful Japanese girl I’m mad about…I’m a hypocrite, sue me)


19 responses to “Japan to World: We gotz the Whores!

  1. Pingback: I’m not a creep! « Whifling’s Blog

  2. I like the knee high socks and short skirts >_>

  3. Amen! Brotherrr. Nice rant!

  4. Pingback: The Week in Review (6/21/09) « Smashed and Sinking!!!

  5. Great Job! well said!

  6. Pingback: Mutantfrog Travelogue » Blog Archive » Nara schoolgirls shun bare legs in favor of a vaguely Islamic aesthetic

  7. Pingback: Japan, You Sicken Me…. « Smashed and Sinking!!!

  8. you know that gov is full of ugly male officer who never had a cute girl friend because they were too busy studying to enter the gov. see whats behind? its rather what these Oyaji wishes for themselves. urg

    • Why study when you just get handed your government position by daddy? :-P

      But yeah, the family would be aghast if boy political wonder was seen hanging out with a cadre of beautiful girls….better to have the family arrange a marriage….

      …so either way, pervs….

  9. Pingback: Japan Ain’t All Hello Kitty: A Government Beyond Change? « Smashed and Sinking!!!

  10. I think you are suffering from a (common) misunderstanding of Japanese women and dress codes by western (horny) men, so I’ll let you in on some big secret:

    Cosplay outfit does not equal prostitution or even sexual promiscuity.

    Younger Japanese women like to dress like skanks, yeah, but to say they are automatically skanks if they do is just your dirty mind, nothing more.

    It’s another culture, get used to it. Don’t just apply your western “wisdom” to Japanese culture. Lots of misunderstandings and eventually prison, will be the outcome ;-)

  11. I don’t know, I’ve actually become fairly used to it in general, to the point where I can see short skirts all day and not notice, then suddenly, cleavage surprises me (which would have been reverse in the US, where cleavage is just always in your face)

    I’d say it was me looking at them with my western ‘wisdom,’ but when a girl in short skirt and hooker boots walks by, my Japanese girlfriend is usually first to nudge me and whisper ‘look at that whore…’

    In the end, regardless, they need to be more aware of the image they’re sending abroad, because people in other places DO see it differently…

    PS: Drake, enjoying your presence of the boards, do stop by more often!

    • I agree. They need to be aware of the message they are sending by how they dress…

      On a side note, your girlfriend is like me…I’m guessing your girlfriend has some experiences abroad? Otherwise, it’s hard to notice how J people dress because you are so used to seeing it all the time.

      I’ve been trying to ignore those people though. I became too judgmental and harsh whenever I saw them so I needed to learn how to ignore them… and other pop culture like AKB48 and Korean girls groups. I don’t know why I’m so bothered by them.

  12. This was a fucking brilliant post.

  13. It’s all about marketing…and the worship of cute schoolgirls is not too bad either. It works for me at the very least.

  14. Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive learn something like this before. So good to find somebody with some unique ideas on this subject. realy thank you for beginning this up. this web site is something that’s needed on the web, somebody with somewhat originality. useful job for bringing something new to the web!

  15. Reblogged this on Mary's Silence and commented:

  16. Japs don’t have any sense of fashion period! Go to Japan and you’ll see why.

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